“I Want Homework for Christmas” Said No One Ever


Jack Stenger

Wire staffer Shemar Willims would like to give back the “gift” of work over holiday break.

“The streets are filled with Christmas cheer.” If you haven’t seen the movie from which that line comes from, you had no childhood. However, I can’t blame those kids who have never seen the Grinch because it was probably the never-ending piles of homework that prevented them from being able to actually experience a “true” Christmas.

As we beg and plead our teachers to free us from the dominion school work has over us during the break, they cruelly laugh and promptly give us thousands of assignments to complete. Instead of actually doing the work, most students like myself put it off to actually do what we’re supposed to over a BREAK: rest. How are we supposed to relax and enjoy our break and once more for emphasis: a break: when we’re stressing out over a completely unnecessary abomination to humankind?

I’m pretty sure I’m not the only one who wouldn’t mind to time travel back to when homework was created to have a serious conversation with this immoral person who thought it was smart to invent such a thing. Now I know I’m going on a tangent, but what student who is fed up with school wouldn’t?

Why even have a break if we’re going to be given work to stress over like any other school night? It totally defeats the purpose, especially if it’s around any big holiday where family will definitely visit or students will travel.  As someone who has dealt with the issue of procrastination heavily during breaks, work just leads to more stress. I know we as students have an obligation to school and should start earlier and stay focused but these teachers were once students as well. They know the struggle of doing homework over break instead of enjoying it for what it’s supposed to be.

Google defines “break” as a short vacation. The last time I checked, a vacation was defined as a recess from all work and stress-inducing related activities such as thinking about the fact that you have to type a three page essay instead of drinking hot chocolate and watching the “25 Days of Christmas” marathon on ABC Family.

Thankfully for us, our guardian angel Mr. Douglass has done it once again and relieved us of this reality. Any teacher who had the audacity to think of assigning homework over this break, I will gladly have a conversation with you about why you would put students through this stress. Enjoy your break though because I still love you as teachers and people.